As it goes with me in nearly all things, I speak first and think later. Emotions are never far from the surface and unlike The Mister, who I never recall making an emotional decision, but rather contemplates all details until paint peels off the wall before deciding to move, I regret many of my quick from the hip declarations.
Being guided by emotion surely has its ups and down and regret has certainly been my friend for years. I have regretted many things that just hours before seemed so very right as I loudly made declarations complete with a fist pump and foot stamp.
Like swearing off fast food, forever….like the pixie cut that look adorable on Gennifer Godwin on People magazine…..like the 8 miler that I needed because I had not run in 2 weeks. I have bought horizontal striped tunics that stretch for miles across my backside in an emotional response to a ‘nothing to wear” kind of morning.
I have also said things I wish I could take back. Desperately. I have sworn off relationships in the midst of white-hot anger and cursed the thought of grace for their transgressions.
The problem with regret is that pride often keeps us from changing our mind. Somehow that characteristic of “doing what I said I would do” or “being a woman of my word” is much safer than “I was hasty, or wrong, or even more difficult….I’m sorry.”
And so it goes with regret. You can’t grow out a pixie cut any quicker, but you can repair damaged relationships. You can give grace where you once made quick judgments…..even when the judgments were right, but your grace was nowhere to be found.
Better yet, I am learning, through the example of the ever patient, seldom ruffled Mister to slow down, listen more, talk less, take a few days, or if you are him a few months, to think it through before you make a statement. If you ever make one at all. I am learning that very few things in life need my opinion.