What God told me this morning in my Gideon Bible Study:
Numbers 31 tells a mesmerizing story of 32,000 sweet virgin girls that the Israelites mercifully let live when they ruthlessly attacked the country of Midian and brought it down….ummm, well, not exactly.
See, God instructed them to annihilate EVERYTHING. That included the beautiful sweet innocent Midianite virgins. Probably 12 or 13 year old girls who were just losing their baby fat and starting to bloom into beautiful young women. Untouched, innocent.
Yes, they were to be destroyed. Throats cut, speared to death. What kind of god is this God of the Israelites?
A God who knows that inside of these sweet virgins was the seed of their forefathers that would breed and generate a nation of ruthless barbarians. Sweet virgins who black hair blew in the wind while they walked the hills giggling and laughing as young girls do and inside their hearts were black. Their intentions would grow a half breed nation with young Israelite men of rebellious destructive vagabonds that would kill, steal and destroy from the Israelites.
And the whole time, God is sovereign and just. Even in his commands to destroy these young girls, He knew. Just as He knows that the toleration of innocent things in my life are actually the kiss of death in relationships. When He tells me to destroy those things that help me cope, allow me pleasure, build my “self worth” I wonder, what kind of selfish God are you? Bent on my continual sacrificing of everything? Do You find pleasure in taking everything from me?
And He tells me, “It is for your good Child. I see the destruction these tiny seeds are sowing. I know where this ends up.”
And He knows that the sin appears to be a sweet young barefoot girl, walking along the hillside hair blowing smiling and laughing but she actually glows red hot with eyes bent on destruction. He knows that she thirsts for blood and is bent on detroying.
I do not see it, but He does. That is when I trust and rid my life of what others may see as extreme or foolish and walk so close to Him that our footsteps meld and I feel His breath on my skin. I trust you God, even in this, even in the trusting without seeing. I trust You. Sometimes it’s best to stop trying to understand and just trust.