To all the Moms I’ve loved before

The following is an adaptation of one of Willie and Julio’s best, and as such is strictly my opinion……

To my young friends who just got married and want to wait to have babies “after you have spent a few years as a couple” or “when we are in a better place financially”
Go head and get pregnant and here’s why:
1) Get ’em in and get ’em out. Me and The Mister will be 44 this year and we are just about done raising kids. I figure the party is just getting started and he and I arestill young enough to close it down.

To my Mom friends who have littles: enjoy every minute. Put ’em in the bed with you and let them sleep there. Let them suck their thumb if they want, they will have less attachment issues. And don’t sweat potty training. There are no easy tricks. If they are not dry at night, they are not ready. Take the time to kiss their sweet little lips when they lay there sleeping so quiet after they have driven you to the brink of insanity. And put your phone down.

To my friends who would love to be a mom but are not for whatever reason:  I don’t know how it feels, but I do know what loss is like. It sucks, but it’s not an ending. God did not create mothers. He created men and women with equipment to procreate, and you are no less His creation if you have not. You have a lot of value as a woman, married or not. Enjoy everything that He has for you. He would never cheat you, no not our God.

To my Mom friends with teen/young adult children:
When your kids act horrid and do everything in the world to go exactly 180 from how you designed their life plan don’t stress it. This year was an epiphany for me. I learned to let go, to ask, not tell, enable, not demand and love in a much more healthy way. God’s got it….and He does not need you to become His manipulating nag assistant. Don’t let your joy rise or fall on the action of your child. Don’t listen to well intending people tell you what you should do. Just put them in Jesus hands, lay down basic house rules and remember,  you are more than a mother. Your husband still needs a wife and you still need a life. Keep one thing in your life that belongs to just you. I’ve run many a mile just to get away from the chaos for a few minutes.
When your children act remarkable and make you proud, thank God for His goodness in spite of your weakness. Mostly, remember that our job is to teach them to fly. Don’t be sad when they leave. If they can survive in this crazy world outside your home, by gosh, you did something right.

To my friends with mothers in heaven:
Every time Mother’s Day rolls around I always tell The Mister, “I’m sorry your mama is not here” and he answers with something like this, “Oh it’s OK, she would not want to come back.” Pretty wise words. If your mama is in heaven, you really get the bad end of the deal, not her. We like to think they are looking over the edge of heaven, but really? As if we are any competition to The Son of God? Like they would be fascinated with us when they can talk to GOD? On the other hand, I like to think that God allows “sneak peeks” especially to mothers up there. I’m sure Ms. Betty knows here baby boy ended up with a stunning wife and the prettiest grand babies, there ever was. In her glorified body though, she maybe aware of how her children are, but cares more, so much more, about the Lamb. In fact, I am pretty sure she would tell us tomorrow, “Having a great time, wish you were here.”

To My friends who have lost children:
Again, I have no words, nor can I imagine the pain. I did lose a sister when I was ten and I remember how it turned my mother inside out. I would not cheapen your sorrow with empty words but instead I would embrace you and tell you that it’s OK to cry, in fact it’s good to cry. I would tell you that I will take your sad heart to Father and remind Him of His promises to carry our grief and sorrows.

To my beautiful daughters:
I love you more than life itself, even on the days you nearly sucked the life out of mine. I am blessed and despite all our dysfunction, God had His way in it all and He does all things good. There are many things I hope for you, but I have learned instead of telling you, I tell The Father. We have long talks about the two of you. He has even sometimes let me see a hint of His plans. It’s gonna blow your mind!
And I am going to spoil your children beyond any reason.


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