The best laid plans will often leave you frustrated. Have you ever figured the whole thing out then realized the last leg of the journey can change everything? I am a girl who likes to see what is coming up around the bend. You can call it control freak, I prefer to call it well prepared. The Mister learned early on in our union that the smallest change of plans could send me into utter despair. He learned this the hard way. Thankfully for him, and for me, I am learning in my middle age years to roll with the flow, to adapt, to become for fluid as my friend Andy Hall puts it, and lately, I am learning to look for the open window at the dead-end street.
Mind you, I prefer my plans to come to fruition, but 2012 has proven to be the year of dead ends. And yet this morning I find myself gazing through open windows…….
Open windows of more time alone with The Mister, a gift really. Sure we spend it studying bicuspid valves, saphenous veins and endocrine systems, but it’s face time and a million laughs had been had over his pronunciation and my bossiness. Sometimes deadend jobs give way to open windows of new horizons.
Open windows of appreciation for who my girls are, and who they are becoming. My plans are not at their top priority, but after all, they are constructing their life, not mine. So I look through the open window to who they are becoming, and I learn to appreciate the parts of them that are so different from me. I learn to enjoy the breeze of change blowing through this open window and with God’s help, keep the window wide open. They teach me to look at life in a different way, and He promises to watch over them. I lean against the window sill and thank God for the dead-end street of my plans for their life. He has more for them.
Open windows of stillness. This season has brought me to a window where I can pull up a chair and sit for a moment. I have spent many a season running the road, directing traffic and helping with construction. This season, He invites me to sit, be still and watch the sunset through the open window. At first I fidget and stir, anxious to get up and move. Ready to “get busy ” and “stop wasting time” but He stills me in front of the view and as I sit and watch, I see the splendor of a sunset. I am awed that He could accomplish this without my help. I am humbled that He does not need me, yet wants me. In that moment, through the open window, I see a promise of the sunrise tomorrow. With His help, He will allow me to get back out in the road, direct some traffic, build some houses, but not tonight. This season I sit and just enjoy the view.
Dead ends always give way to open windows. In my frustration over traffic jams, and unfinished construction I often slam the window shut before stopping to see what waits on the other side. Sometimes there is no other way to slow me down than to let me run out of road. This time, after a fit of rage, tears shed over my stalled and failed plans, He invites me to see what He is doing on the other side of the window. I believe I will sit here for a few minutes, catch my breath and share a cup of coffee with this Master Planner. He may tell me about Phase 2 construction, or we may just sit and watch the birds from out open window for a while……